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Featured Post

Just How Does Anything Get Preserved?

I broke into a sweat upon waking up from a fever dream the other night:

Fresh off his victory with the East Wing of the White House, President Trump announces further upcoming improvements:

Gettysburg Battlefield Casino and Resort

Cemetery Ridge will be upgraded with a Resort and Casino, including a 100 foot tower, from which the entire Battlefield can be seen.  Slot machines will be added to the Cyclorama, so that Patriots can play with special blue or grey tokens while observing the battlefield enactment.

Statue of Miss America

From New York Harbor, visitors can see a renewed 21^st century Statue of Liberty, more becoming of America’s beauty – short dress and heels, bigger boobs, and a smile. Oh, and not copper colored but white, as God intended.

Mount Rushmore Trump Tribute

President Trump’s visage will be the only one to be seen on Mount Rushmore. To paraphrase The Princess Bride: “Have you ever heard of Washington, Jefferson, Lincoln, and Roosevelt? Morons!” 

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